So lately I’ve been getting some flack from people (not on this journal, in a chat I hang out in) about how I’m such an old lady because I have a cat and enjoy knitting and collect dolls. And this is something that has irked me regarding stereotypes for the past several years.
There are a lot of double standards in the world, especially pertaining to race and gender. And I get that and while it mildly annoys me, I don’t get very angry about most of them most of the time. If I did I would be exhausted all the time from how much energy I had to expend on anger. I do my best to educate people who are unaware, and that’s about all I can handle on any given day. But the stereotypes about “old lady hobbies” just drive me crazy.
First off, why the hell is it such an insult to be an old lady? It’s apparently one of the most insulting things people can throw at you, after the fact that you’re female and (at least in my case) your body doesn’t conform to societal standards of beauty. Most of the women I admire in my life are already old ladies, or heading in that direction (well, so am I, they’re just closer than me). I’ve said before (and I’ll say again) that if I am half as awesome as my mom when I’m middle-aged, I will count my life a success. And goodness forbid you be a FAT old lady. OH LORD. You’ve already dared to live in a body that doesn’t conform to society’s ideal, and then you have the gall to age in it? It’s almost like people think if you’re not worth having sex with, you’re completely worthless! Oh, wait… That is what they think. XP
Also, what the fuck is it with people still equating knitting with being an old lady? Sure, lots of old ladies knit. But there are also just as many women between the ages of 8 and whatever age “old lady” begins (I don’t presume to know) who enjoy knitting. Hell, there are a whole hell of a lot of women these days who are using knitting as a way to empower themselves as feminists. Because knitting is fucking awesome, guys. Knitting isn’t just about making toilet paper cozies and cat beds. Knitting is an art form, in much the same way sculpting and drawing are art forms. Yeah, some people are only gonna use those skills to make endless reproductions of ceramic kittens, and that’s fine, but other people are going to make stuff that blows your fucking mind, that you never would have even thought about before (like this and this and this and this). I’ve already made my case for knitting on this blog before, so feel free to go back and look at that post if you want.
Lastly, why are cats associated with being both an old lady and crazy? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’ve never actually seen any statistics that show that people who are mentally ill have more cats than people who are neurotypical. And I call bullshit on the general idea that “dogs are for men and cats are for women”. Fuck that. I love dogs and I would own a dog along with my cat if I wasn’t in a tiny apartment that didn’t allow dogs. In fact, I fully intend to own many dogs over the course of my lifetime, and many cats as well, preferably all at the same time (and I also reserve the right to own tarantulas, rabbits, rats and/or hedgehogs, as I see fit). Furthermore, my oldest brother doesn’t even like most dogs because he thinks they’re less intelligent than cats (and except in special cases, I can’t argue that logic). Why the hell doesn’t he get called a “crazy cat man”? He has three cats right now to my one, and yet I get labeled the insane one? Never mind how insulting it is to be called “crazy”, whether you have any mental illnesses or not (because it demeans and others those who do struggle with mental illness).
Where is this coming from? Why is it okay to laugh and point at a woman who has a cat and a small fiber addiction and taunt her about being “old”? Does everyone dislike their mothers and grandmothers that much, to thinking that being an old woman is some horrible affliction?
I’m sure at this point I’ve got some people rolling their eyes and telling me not to be so sensitive. Really? You really don’t see the problem with treating the state of advanced age (and usually wisdom and experience) as something to be looked down upon? Get back to me on that when you’re 85. No, really. No wonder the baby boomers seem to hate my generation so much.